day 223 - "even the SOUND of bacon frying is like applause!"

[magisperica]

Who: Skyla and you!
Open: Open
When: Day 223
Where: All over the Bastion
What: MEAT SURVEY aka "why stop at donut trees when you could have BACON CROPS"
Format: Started with prose, will match with whatever you want to use
Warnings: Skyla's pottymouth, will edit if anything comes up.

So. So.

If you're out and about around the Bastion today, you'll find yourself pulled aside by Skyla, no matter how busy you may be. As shocking as it is that she's actually making an effort to interact with everyone, even more puzzling is the little notepad she has with her, that appears to be occupied by some kind of meat-centric tally chart.

She'll kind of glare for a moment, like she's irritated at being drawn into a conversation (despite the fact that she's the one who started this in the first place) before saying, in a completely casual voice;

"What's your favourite kind of meat? If you're a vegan or some shit, just pick the one that starts with your favourite letter of the alphabet."

No, this isn't an innuendo and yes, you are going to have to ask for context.

Comments

[dragonsorcsandwolves]

"It's not an efficient use of shards," he responds. "If you make a bacon tree, for example, you've paid 200 shards to get an endless supply of bacon. That's great, but what about ham? If you want an endless supply of ham, that's another 200 shards for a ham tree. Then there's sausages and ribs and all the other kinds of meat that come from pigs. The total cost just the get the most popular cuts'll be pretty high. It'd be more efficient to just pay 200 shards to get a herd of pigs and let them breed. Not only do you get an endless supply of all the different pig meats, but those meats can be prepared and seasoned in whatever way people like, not just whichever way the meat orchard makes them. And you can even change the taste; a pig finished on acorns will taste different than one finished on corn. Plus you get all the other things that pigs can provide: leather, waste disposal, fertilizer, et cetera. More bang for your buck to just buy the animals."

[magisperica]

"Fuck me, you must be fun at parties."

Her voice is flat and she lets out a little snort, looking distinctly annoyed. Did he really think that when she'd already introduced this as her 'dumbfuck idea' that she needed lecturing on the inefficiency of her little plan?

"Seriously, though," she continues, going back to her book with a little scowl. "Is there a reason you felt you had to piss all over my fucking parade or are you just in a good mood today?"

[dragonsorcsandwolves]

Rob blinks, confused for a moment; he thought he was helping by pointing out how she could conserve shards.

"I wanted to make sure you'd thought of everything before you spent the shards, that way you wouldn't regret it later when the flaws showed up."

[magisperica]

That gets another huff out of her, and a scowl -- her expression simply twists with annoyance and her shoulders tense, like an irritated cat. She really is being lectured -- something she's not exactly in the mood for.

"Yeah, well, thanks for the advice, Einstein." she mutters, more to herself than him, as she turns away, nose buried back in her book. "I'll make sure I run my next idea to you so I can get your full fucking approval."

[dragonsorcsandwolves]

Rob, still confused over what went wrong (he assumes he screwed up somewhere, because that's usually what happens), lets her get a fair distance away before he comes up with anything to say. What he comes up with isn't exactly prime material, but hopefully it'll go over better than whatever he said before.

"Can you walk it by instead?"