[Day 156] | [Closed] And oh, come colder weather

[hellpyre]

Who: Twins, and one half of a set (Kaoru, Hikaru + Rin)
Open: Closed
When: Day 156, afternoon
Where:  Hospital
What: Bon helped Rin work through a lot of her feelings about Hikaru's arrival and the continued lack of Yuki in her life, and things are better for it, but there's still something she has to do...
Format: Action
Warnings: You all know the drill by now.

[Apologies - good ones, anyway - were never Rin's strong suit. She usually had to be muscled in to being sincere by Father Fujimoto because in her mind she hadn't done anything wrong  whenever she got in trouble like that. She was just giving people what they deserved for being assholes, after all. But it was moments when she actually fucked up in a way that hurt people she didn't want to hurt that she found herself at a loss for what to do. Should she apologize? Would it even be accepted if she did? Would she come off sounding insincere? What if the person she hurt didn't want to see her?

These were all the things going through her head as she stared at the closed hospital room door, holding a bag in her hands in front of her, slightly more cleaned up and dressed up than she normally would have been on a typical day. She stared at the door handle, as if willing it to move on its own so she didn't have to make that step forward to grab it herself. If something could have just conveniently shoved her in the room to get things started...

But that wasn't going to happen, and she knew it. Taking a breath in, she went for the door and knocked on it gently.]

Comments

[individuating]

[The photograph sends an unexpected pang of bitterness through Hikaru. How lucky is Rin, to be able to have a photograph? He'd do weird things to have one of the Host Club, right now. But--]

Wait--are you talking about that elephant? [If they're talking about items from home, there are very few elephant plant holders he knows of.

Since he's been brought forwards, he looks at the photo and raises an eyebrow. Rin really does go for beefcakes.]

That's a lot of people. Do they know you're a demon?

[hellpyre]

This was in my pocket when I got dropped on the Skyway... I'm glad, though.

[She smiled fondly at the picture, nodding to Hikaru's question. There was also a feline with odd little horns and two tails on Rin's head, grinning just as much as her owner.]

They're my classmates. And yeah. I... had to lie for a while, but when I finally told 'em they were more mad about the lyin' than over what I really was. See... all of us were trainin' to be exorcists back home.

[She started pointing them out, naming the people in the picture.]

Shiemi Moryiyama, Izumo Kamiki, Renzo Shima, Nemu Takara, Konekomaru Miwa... Ryuuji I already pointed out. His family name is Suguro, by the way. That half-dressed lady there was my sword instructor, Shira Kiragakure. And that...

[Finally pointing at the glasses wearing girl.]

Is my twin sister. Yuki.

[individuates]

[he kind of saw the resemblance before Rin pointed her out, but wasn't entirely sure until she said so. He also realises he said something a little tactless. As nice as it would be to have a photo of their friends, he had his twin here and now. Which was more than he'd had for a long time - certainly more than Rin had now.

He had learned the hard way, coming to the Bastion, how easily it could all be taken away. To appreciate what he had now. He offered her a small smile.]

It's something to hold onto, ne? Until you find them again.

[individuating]

[Hikaru really, really wants to say something about Yuki but--Kaoru didn't, so should he keep his mouth shut too?]

You two don't look very alike.

[That's what he settles for in the end, rather than any of the questions swirling around his head. He says it carefully, aware that he may be stepping onto a mine with that statement. There's a resemblance between the girls in the photo, of course, but... well, he's never really considered that there are twins who exist that function differently to he and Kaoru. It's obvious when he thinks about it, but this is the first time it's been even remotely relevant.]

[hellpyre]

Yeah. It is.

[Rin smiled at the picture, tucking it away after a moment and looking up at Hikaru with a blink. Oh. Right. They were identical. Rin hadn't really meet any other twins before meeting Kaoru.

If Yuki had been there, she would have rambled something about the statistics of identical versus fraternal, but all Rin could do was shrug.]

We're really different in a lotta ways. We've always been like that. Hell, she's a damn genius. I'm an idiot. It's not just looks.

[individuates]

Hmm~? [leans back into Hikaru] That's kind of strange. But also interesting, I guess. We have a lot of similarities and… usually our differences make up for each other's shortcomings.

[he doesn't really know any other twins to be able to tell how normal this is. Are they normal, or is Rin? Wait, what did she just say…?]

E-eh? Rin-chan, you say that almost like you're useless...

[individuating]

Whatever I can't do, Kaoru can. [He says in agreement, adjusting his arm around Kaoru to hold onto him more comfortably.] And the same the other way. [That's how it's always been. It's strange to think that there are twins out there who aren't like that, when it seems so... normal, to him.

Did she say it almost like she was useless? She only admitted to being an idiot, right? Still, even then...]

You're not really that stupid. Not enough to be called an idiot, at least.

[And that's pretty high praise from him.]

[hellpyre]

Nah. Trust me. I'm pretty dumb. I'm actually a drop out. The only reason I wound up at True Cross was 'cause my guardian forced me to go.

[Well that and she sort of screamed in Lady Pheles' face that she'd better damn well make her an exorcist...

But that's really neither here nor there in this conversation.]

I was always gettin' compared to her. "Yuki-chan is so smart, Yuki-chan is so athletic, Yuki-chan never gets in trouble or punches guys in the face for being jerks..."

[individuates]

...and what I can't do, Hikaru can. [nods, settling into Hikaru's hold comfortably] You may not be very academic, sure, but not everyone is. And you're good at other stuff. [because if you say you're in idiot and dismiss your other talents... Yeah, that's a little like saying you have no use at all. And Rin-chan is good at plenty of things. Like fighting. And food. And pastries.

Speaking of pastries,If they don't hold back a little they will soon be annihilated. But if you leave them much longer, Tama-chan will assume they are fair game...]

[individuating]

You were smart enough to get us away from that thing on the Skyway. It takes a pretty quick thinker to do what you did. [That heart-stopping, extremely well-timed duck, for example. If she hadn't been smart enough to plan that out, they'd be dead.

It sounds like a pretty standard sibling complex, though.]

[hellpyre]

... I'm a--... what'd Colin call me? ... a heavy hitter. I'm basically a tank. That's not really some one who needs to think all that much. Really I just... do what needs to be done, that's all.

[Once upon a time she would have been more apt to boast about such things, about how awesome she was, but her time in the Bastion had tempered her ego in to something a lot more frail.

Too many mistakes, too many wrong moves...]

[individuates]

Ah that's right... [tilting his head towards Hikaru]. When she says she's a hard hitter, she means a hard hitter.

But you handled Hikaru pretty well - coming off the skyway I mean, not saying that he constantly needs handling. But that doesn't sound like idiocy to me... I can't say I would have managed the same.

[individuating]

Hard-hitter or not, if you were an idiot we would be dead. [He doesn't like to think about that whole fiasco and it shows in the way he tenses against Kaoru, but dammit Rin, you're wrong and need to be told so.] Not just anyone could have gotten us through that, and it wasn't dumb luck either. If that's what you're like when you're not thinking, then that must mean the rest of us are really bad.

[hellpyre]

I--...

[She was so used to being told that she wasn't thinking, that she was reckless and dangerous the hearing it said with so much certainty left her speechless. She really didn't know what to say to either of them after that.]

[individuates]

Seriously, it doesn't do you any good to compare yourself to others and put yourself down because you're not what they are. [rubbing Hikaru's hand. This little bit of wisdom is not his own - it's something he picked up during his time here. But it doesn't hurt to share.]

Not even if it's your twin you're comparing yourself to - and other people have no business comparing you to her, either.

[individuating]

Besides, even twins will eventually come to have different strengths and interests. [To paraphrase what Kaoru had said to him while he was learning to drive carriages.] You can't measure two separate people against each-other; of course one of them is going to be better at some things than the other. That's just the way it works.

[He's said his piece. There'd better be more pastry in his near future for stopping being a brat long enough to help lecture one of Kaoru's friends.]

[hellpyre]

[Speaking of those, would be a good time for Tama-chan to steal Rin's pastry, because she's all but forgotten about it at this point.]

It's... not like they didn't care about me... the people that said those things...

[Meaning the priests. Everyone else that said those things were often saying them just to be cruel, because that's how gossiping mothers and young girls were. But Rin didn't count their opinions as matter.]

... Dad never really said it, though. Even when he got frustrated with how badly I was doin'.

[individuates]

[good Hikaru. More pastry for you. Rin's pastry, to be exact - even though they have their own, Kaoru leans over and steals it like he owns it.

…oh, you wanted it, Tama-chan? Sorry and all that…]

Because he got it, ne? My point is, nobody has a right to say that to you, though. Whether they mean well or not.

[there, Rin. Have you been told?]

[individuating]

[Yes, pastry. Thank you Kaoru! It always tastes better when it was supposed to be someone else's. He'll eat that quite happily, watching Rin expectantly. She'd better understand what they've just said, or he's going to get annoyed.]

[hellpyre]

[She understood it, but that didn't mean it was going to magically erase fifteen years of being told the same things over and over again. It wasn't going to take back the things she'd done to make people say those things, either.

A part of her wanted to believe that, but the rest of her would probably always think of herself in that way.

She looked up, forcing a strained smile at the two of them.]

Yeah. You're right.

[individuates]

[pouts slightly, puffing out his cheeks] Hey, hey. Why do I get the feeling you're just agreeing so you can get us off your case…?

[individuating]

[Hikaru's physical reaction the exact same as Kaoru's, in sync right down to the last muscle.]

You just want us to shut up, don't you?

[That's the last time he ever tries to help.]

[hellpyre]

N-no that's not it at all!

[Rin flailed her hands in front of her, looking fairly apologetic even if it was sort of a lie.

She couldn't explain it to them, though. What it was like to be feared when you're seven years old, to have those whispers behind your back about what a monster you must be, to cause that kind of pain. She coudln't explain how it felt to find out that everything they said was true, all because of a secret hidden for fifteen years.]

I get what you're tryin' to say and I appreciate that you're tryin' to make me feel better, but... it's complicated for me. It always has been. Don't mean I love my sister any less. And it's not like I'm gonna throw myself off the Skyway because I think I'm useless or anythin'.

[individuates]

[…and yet she is still not sorry.

Tilts his head towards his brother's slightly - as if aiming for confidentiality, but not actually managing it] …ne, Hikaru, did we say she was going to throw herself off the Skyway...?

[individuating]

[He gives a sidelong glance to his brother, leaning over his shoulder a little more to add to the feigned sense of privacy.] Sounds like a projected inner thought, ne, Kaoru? Not much we can do about one of those.

[Unless you want to attach a bungee cord to her permanently, which he is totally down for.]