Day 255 - Yeah no

[polariity]

When: Day 255, midday
Who: The Helmsman and anyone who trips over his prone body
Open/Close: Open
Where: The middle of the Bastion, facedown
What: You know what's nice? Grass is nice.
Format: I'll match
Warning: Blood warning/minor self harm in Aoi and Disciple threads

Ever since he'd been brought to the hospital in the middle of the night by Aradia and the Disciple, the Helmsman has been quiet. His throat has been in no condition to really speak, which had been one thing, but besides that... Any attempts to speak with him have just earned a narrow eyed look and thinned lips, although he'd gone along with attempts to feed him and put him into some cleaner clothes.

Apparently, today's the day that changes because anyone going about their business in the Bastion is liable to notice the gray-skinned and horned alien laying facedown in the middle of the little settlement. The clothes he's wearing are far too big for his food-deprived skinny body but despite what it looks like, he is breathing and is alive.

Don't mind him, he's just gonna be here for a while. If you trip, well, that's your problem. Suck it up.

Comments

[polariity]

...Well, it's sort of a 'Psii doesn't want to bother' thing, and also-

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He's still sort of scared to admit that this could have the actual possibility of being real. At least he's moved onto active denial. That's... progress. Maybe.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

...Oh they're back to this. She pets his hair a little. Geez Psiionic you'd make a person feel unwanted. Also, she's pretty sure eating was like one of your favorite things to do.

"Right. Let's say it doesn't provide nutrients. Just saying that. Saying that you're relying on outside sources of food and such. Would you eat then? Cause if you start wasting away because you refuse actual food, I am going to be pissed. Shit, we're probably going to have to keep you on soft foods and liquids aren't we. Like you came out the desert starving or something. "

[polariity]

A pause, and he nods. The fingers in his hair feel... it's kind of nice. Even if it's not real. Can't be real. Nope. Okay, he needs to breathe before he has a panic attack.

N0 phys1c4l f00d 21nc3 1nst4ll4t10n. Which explains a lot about the state of his body.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

Of course. That would be work, feeding a Helmsman. Too much effort, too messy. God, a thousand sweeps without real food. It's a blessing he can eat whatever he has. Her hands almost grasp at his hair before she gets back control and smoothes it down. Slow slow. Calm.

"Soups and ...I guess mushed up things. If we can. I'll try to find fruit. You like fruit."

[polariity]

Another pause, and he peers up awkwardly up at her from beneath his hair and behind his goggles. She can probably guess what he's going to ask about before he forces the word into order.

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[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

She laughs, sudden and loud, then smothers it behind her hand. Predictable yet, but it's those little moments that make her feel less like he's going to call her fake forever. He's still in there.

"I'll have to ask around. Like I said,I haven't been good about food...Or information either. Need to work on that."

[polariity]

A low kind of chirring noise echoes in his throat, too rough and broken to be a proper sound. It's a pale imitation of the kind of sounds he'd make a long time ago, scolding and exasperated at any slip ups.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

"Oh shush." She runs a thumb along his cheek. She's still a little worried about the state of those vocal chords but he can make some noises. Better than nothing.

"You're ridiculous. Like you have any room to talk on such things."

[polariity]

"Mmmmmrr." His eyes flutter shut for a second at the way her thumb strokes along his skin, although he still finds himself instinctively shaking with it.

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[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

Past tense. Ran. She wonders if that's important or just a slip. It's hard to tell. Her thumb pauses in the little track it made, from just below the goggles to the edge of his jaw. Trembling could be good or bad and he might not tell her either way.

"Yes, yes. Very responsible. Being alone on the run makes you forget that people can give you much information or that food comes in more varieties than charred and dried. I'm lucky people found me or I'm sure I'd still be out on the skyway, watching from the outside, trying to eat their tuskbeasts."

[polariity]

"Thhhkbrrr..." It's mumbled and hoarse, but he is trying. The effort of trying makes him curl up a little more, however, nudging against some of her long wild hair.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

"Hey--Hey don't force it." She croons, thumb tracing that path again quickly. He shouldn't push himself too fast. Can people hurt their throats like this? She's not a healer and worrying is certainly not helping.

"I can read just fine, you know. Have for sweeps and sweeps."

[polariity]

Another miserable little noise that isn't anything in particular. Almost reluctantly, always stubborn on the ridiculous things, he lets the words form in the air again.

tu2kb342t2??

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

"They have big tusks. And fur. And this long ridiculous appendage coming from the middle of their face." She taps his nose, "I don't know what else to call these things. I'm sure humans have a word for it but I don't know. But there looks to be a ton of meat on them. I could survive a perigree on it."

She pauses, "And don't be so sullen. You weren't talking at all earlier. Give things time."

[polariity]

Well, she knows him. It's either nothing at all, or all he has. An even middle is sometimes a thing his mind just can't comprehend. So for now he just makes another annoyed noise and presses his face against her knees, still curled up in a ball.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

There's her stubborn idiot. Glad to see he's still just as ridiculous about things as he ever was. It's reassuring. It's reassuring and suddenly overwhelming. He's alive. He's talking to her. He's pressed against her knee like she's got her lap filled with a book and pen and he still wants touch. She takes a breath but it shudders. She suddenly wants to cry again. Happy tears, but tears nonetheless.

"Psii...You can try speaking but maybe don't expect it to come out well for a bit."

[polariity]

The words that come in response are formed... slow. Careful and hesitant, like he's not sure he wants a response back.

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[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

"Reality doesn't stop facts like you haven't spoken in more sweeps than it seems possible. Dreams and hallucinations are the place where you could probably speak normally with a throat like that. Or is this about something else?"

She's not sure what answer he wants. What answer he's clearly afraid to get.

[polariity]

The shake of his head means this might have to do with something else, but he doesn't eve hint what it could be for a good few moments. It's only after what might be some deep thought does he finally form the words again.

1 w4nt t0 d0 th1n92.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

She pauses, strokes his cheek almost absently. She's still not sure what he wants, what he means, but catching up to his thoughts has always been a bit of a trial.

"What do you want to do?"

[polariity]

Another long time before an answer comes. Flicking out between his lips, his split tongue grinds against one of his fangs anxiously. He's a coward, he knows he is, and this is frightening.

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[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

"Anything is pulling from a large group of a lot of things. I mean...do you want to go look at the skyway? Go up to my hiveblock? Walk--er...float? Is that how you got out here? Cause I'm positive you can't walk. I'd be happy to do anything with you, just don't want to tire you out."

[polariity]

There's just a nod after nod of every suggestion she makes. Yes, yes, yes. His fingers give a shake, wanting to curl against her somehow but with none of the strength to make such a thing possible. There's obviously something he's not saying. He's just too scared to make it clear.

[disciplewhomsignlessloves]

She pauses, watching him closer. She's forgotten the little things, after so long. The way he hides things, the all or nothing of his enthusiasm and apathy.

"If you want to do everything, luckily, we seem to have the time. ...but Psii, it's okay to tell me anything. To ask for anything."

[polariity]

23lf12h is erratically formed in the air, messy and nearly incoherent, gone within seconds as he just curls up all the harder. It's an old song and dance. Old and once buried when he'd traveled with them for so long, when they'd taught him it was okay to want things for his own reasons and no one else's no matter what it was.