[day 187] she calls out to the man on the street, "sir, can you help me?" (closed)

[ourlegends]

Who: Hilda, Yukio, Rin (N, AZ, Anna, and Colin later)
Open: Closed
When: Day 187
Where: The Hospital
What: Goddammit, Hilda.
Format: action brackets!
Warnings: A very injured teenager and probably a lot of yelling at her when she's awake.

[ After all of the drama of the previous night, Hilda had learned of what had happened that day before she and N talked, and found out that his castle had appeared on the Skyway. Not just another part of Unova, but a part of Unova that held a lot of memories for N. Memories that ... she knew damn well weren't all good.

She still hurt from their conversation, but she understood now why he was acting the way he was. She still had no idea what to do to fix it, so she focused instead on something she knew she could do: She wanted to see the castle for herself. She had to. It was a something she didn't feel she'd have closure on unless she saw it.

She didn't tell anyone where she was going. She slipped out with Emboar early in the morning after feeding the Pokemon, headed to the Skyway so that the two of them could make their way to the Castle themselves.

Getting there wasn't the problem. It took a while of searching, but they did eventually arrive at the Castle just fine. Hilda had stopped, gazing wide-eyed upon the crumbled remains of a once proud-standing castle. She could hardly will herself to move any more than that ...

... And that was her mistake. Something had begun to move into the castle, and it wasn't happy with the trespassers.

Hilda didn't know what had happened. All she knew in that next moment was pain. Emboar cried out for his trainer as she fell, now bleeding from her head and scraped up and bleeding more on one side from falling and sliding from that attack. The blow to her head made it so she was barely conscious as it was. Emboar cried out for his trainer, and tried to charge at their assailant, only to be knocked back. Hilda was lifted, with the intent of being finished off, when Emboar got up and blew a flamethrower in their attacker's direction. Now caught on fire, it let go of Hilda (who didn't escape that without some burns herself), who fell to the ground. Emboar scrambled to lift Hilda into his arms, taking the opportunity to run for it while it was distracted with fire.

He ran, as fast as he could, worried for his trainer's life ... ]

Comments

[unwrittenformula]

Not at the cost of your health! Please, please go back to bed, Hilda...

[It wasn't easy to be gentle with some one who was in that state and insisting on moving at the same, but he tried, urging her back to the bed as carefully as possible.]

[ourlegends]

[ ... Okay. Okay, she'll go back to bed. She lets him help her back into bed, but she insists on sitting up. Even if it hurt to do that. She's also not going to let go of his hand. Have fun with that, N. ]

H-Hey ...

[ She squeezes his hand gently. ]

Don't blame yourself for my stupidity. I ... It's not your fault.

[unwrittenformula]

[He's certainly not going to argue her holding on like that. Not after what he did.]

How can you say that?! I drove you to go there alone!

[ourlegends]

The moment I heard the Castle was there ... I would have gone anyway, no matter what had or hadn't happened. I could have asked for more help than just Emboar in getting there and I didn't. It's not your fault that I was too stupid to do that.

[ She looks to him seriously. ]

You're already in enough pain. I wish I hadn't added to it.

[unwrittenformula]

My pain is no reason to put yourself in danger! What happened to me-- no, it doesn't matter! I was being selfish, and I did nothing but hurt you... ! I don't deserve some one as amazing as you...

[ourlegends]

I'm really not that amazing ...

[ There's her own self-confidence coming into play. She doesn't think she's anything important. She's just a girl who fell into a great many situations and had to deal with it somehow.

She's also a girl who, along the way, fell in love with a misguided - yet utterly wonderful - young man ... ]

You've gone through a lot in your life, N ... It's okay to feel bad about all of it. I can't even begin to imagine how you felt all that time ago, when Ghetsis did what he did ...

It did hurt when you said those things, but ... more than anything, I want to be by your side and help you through all of this.

[ She gently squeezes his hand and tries to smile at him. ]

I wouldn't be in love with you if you didn't deserve my love, N ...

[unwrittenformula]

[Which is of course what he doesn't see at all. He still sees himself as damaged, unlovable.

Hearing that from her...]

I... I want to... believe that... but after everything I did to you-- after everything I've done...

[ourlegends]

... So then, what do you think we should do?

[ Her smile falls back into an exhausted, serious expression. ]

Listen, What you've done doesn't matter anymore. Our world is gone. And even if it weren't, all that matters is what you do with your life now.

You're aware that the things you've done in your life haven't all been good. You don't want to be that person anymore, right? You don't want to be the person Ghetis tried to make you into?

You're not that person, N. You've never been that person. You may not have done all the right things, but you are someone who has a genuine love and passion for Pokemon, and you want happiness for all of them.

You do have a heart, N. It's a heart that has been tossed around and very hurt, but it is a heart that can still love despite that. I see it every day when you interact with the Pokemon, and even if it takes time for your heart to love and accept the humans in your life as well, I know you're capable of it.

So .. even if it takes time for you to love and accept the family we've gained here ... even if it takes time for you to love me, even if you realize you don't love us at all ... I'll be here to give you the love that you do deserve, no matter how much you think you don't.

[ It hurt more than anything to think that maybe he didn't love her, or anyone else in their family at all ... something within her knew that wasn't the case, though. Even if her own insecurities were afraid of it, she knew N, and she knew that he had that heart she spoke of. ]

[unwrittenformula]

I--...

[There was really no arguing with her. She spoke truth. Why wouldn't she? That was her chosen side, after all. The truths that Reshiram saw in her, while Zekrom saw the ideals in N.

But that was the problem with ideals. Truths almost always fell squarely in logic and reason, justified by facts and things that couldn't be denied even if one wanted to so desperately.

Ideals... ideals lay within the heart, governed by emotions and desires. And a heart that had been damaged such as his to the point where he thought he didn't even have one thanks to Ghetsis made it all the more difficult to see the truth beyond the haze of pain and uncertainty he had been left in.

His ego, no matter how big and driven by those thoughts of becoming a hero and being "better than human trainers" it had once been, was no match for the ghosts of his past.

Ghosts he had seen in that castle. Around every corner, in every room, echoing voices of so much grief and torment...

His mouth shut, and his trembling hands took hers again, eyes squeezing tight with tears rolling down as he bent forward and touched his forehead to those clasped hands.]

I do love you... that is my truth... and I only have myself to blame for taking so long to see that...

[ourlegends]

[ She couldn't deny that her heart leapt upon hearing him say those words. Hilda relaxed a little, tears returning to her own eyes and rolling down her cheeks as a smile crossed her face once more. She gently moved her hands to squeeze his again, trying to reassure him that she was here and that she was going to stay by his side. ]

I'm really happy ... it makes me really happy to hear you say that you love me ...

[unwrittenformula]

I truly am sorry that it took me this long to say it... that wasn't fair to you, at all.

[He sniffled, nuzzling his cheek up against her hand.]

I could disregard the entire world and be content, but if you weren't in my life I-... I don't know what I would do.

[ourlegends]

[ She moves to place the hand he nuzzled on his cheek, stroking his cheekbone with her thumb affectionately. ]

I don't ... know when I became so dependent on having you around ...

It's a little scary to think about, sometimes. I'm so used to being independent to some extent, but now I really need you here.

[ She laughed a little. ]

I probably won't get a lot of sleep tonight because I'm so used to having you in bed with me.

[ She didn't sleep well the night they argued, either. That probably didn't help her much when she was on the Skyway ... though it probably wouldn't have helped her much even if she was fully rested, either. ]

[unwrittenformula]

[That was surprisingly comforting to him. For one who was still getting used to physical contact and affection, he found that simple motion to be what he needed to calm his tears.]

We're the same in that... I spent so much of my life in the company of Pokemon and no one else, and now I can't imagine a day without you near me.

[He smiled against her hand, eyes closed for the moment.]

I can stay in the other bed here, if you'd like.

[ourlegends]

Are you sure? What about all the Pokemon? Do you think everyone will be okay if you stay here tonight?

[ She looks at him worriedly. ]

I'd really like it if you did stay here, but I'm worried about the Pokemon ... those eggs could hatch anytime now, and if you're here then Mr. AZ will be the only one outside of the Pokemon with any experience at helping them along ...

[ And there were a lot of eggs. Granted, there were a lot of Pokemon, too, but a few of them were just babies themselves.

Zorua was still so young ... she probably wasn't used to not having her mama around. Maybe it would be a good idea for her papa to be there ...

She really wanted N to stay with her, but she was so worried about the Pokemon ... ]

Are Zorua and Darumaka going to be okay ...?

[unwrittenformula]

AZ is capable of caring for them. If the eggs start hatching, he can come get me. I should... probably go back and get a few things for us anyway.

[Since she's bound to be there a couple of days at least.]

... they're worried. Zoura more than Darumaka. She's been crying a lot. Darumaka just wants to see you home and well.

[ourlegends]

Zorua's already without her mama for a little bit ... will she be okay if she's without her papa, too?

[ This is Hilda. Wounded, in the hospital, and more worried about the pokemon. ]

[unwrittenformula]

[Hilda stop that.]

I could bring her by later. Would that be alright?

[ourlegends]

We'd have to check with Yukio, but I think that might be okay ...

[ What a mommy, she's so worried about her baby. ]

I hope it is. She might feel better if she can see me ...

[ ... And then she blushes and hides her face in her hands. ]

I sound like such an actual mother right now.

[unwrittenformula]

Yukio?

[That's not a name N is familiar with, and it makes him curious. Was he some one in charge of the hospital now?]

Well... you're concerned about her. That's natural, isn't it?

[ourlegends]

Ah ... yeah, he's Rin's brother. He's been in here a couple of times to check up on me. I guess he's a doctor or something here.

[ She sighed, smiling sheepishly. ]

I guess. I was just reminded of how much I sound like my mother.

[ It was hard to think about her mother, knowing she would never see her again, but ... ]

Zorua's still a baby. Of course I'm going to worry about her. Even if her endless amounts of energy do prevent us from sleeping on many occasions ...

[unwrittenformula]

... oh. The cook girl with the tail. I see.

[Does Yukio have a tail?

That's not important.]

You care for her like a child, and she sees you as a mother. It's only to be expected with that in mind.

[ourlegends]

I'm sure Zorua sees you as her papa, too.

[ She reaches out to grasp his hand in hers again. ]

Congratulations, you're a father?

[ ... probably not the best half-joke. ]

[unwrittenformula]

Ah--...

[Well his face certainly got red...]

[ourlegends]

[ She laughs a little at his red face. ]

You'll be a great father to her, though. And to all of the other Pokemon that have yet to hatch.

[ That's right mom, if you were still around you'd have a lot of Pokemon grandchildren. ]

[unwrittenformula]

I... suppose... [achem] Pokemon are easier for me to deal with, at least...