thebastion | Day 133

Entry tags:

Day 133

Who: Roxas and anyone!
Open: Open
When: Day 133
Where: Outside the apartments
What: Sparring time with Nobodies
Format: I'll match
Warnings: None

It's been a long time since Roxas has put much thought into improving his skills. Back in the Organization, he was fighting and training constantly, but during his year and a half in Vatheon, he thinks he spent more time trying to talk people out of fights than actually getting into them. It was a relief, not to need any of that most of the time.

He doesn't think he's lost much of his edge, and so far the monsters he's encountered on the Skyway haven't been that tough, but fighting is now a far cry from 'unnecessary.' He'd rather be at his best.

Which is why he can be found today sparring with his Samurai Nobody in the field near the apartments. He used to train with them a long time ago. It seems like a good place to start.

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Both of them could tell from the start that it wasn't a Pokemon, but for once that didn't temper N's natural curiosity any.

"What is it exactly?"

"It's a Nobody. It used to be human, until it lost its heart."

He hesitates. "We're- both Nobodies, actually."

"You look human, though."

N tilts his head to the side. He's not judging at all, merely trying to understand. A world where things didn't work as they did in his, were Pokemon weren't present but people could 'lose their hearts' and become something else entirely. Or not.

He wasn't a stranger to the concept of other worlds since he had been a part of Vatheon as well, but it didn't mean he understood them any more than he had a year ago.

"How would one go about losing their heart?"

"They say if our will is strong enough, then we still do." He scratches his head. "I don't know if that's really how it is though." It seems kind of mean to label his ally over there as 'weak-willed,' especially after it made it all the way to the Bastion with him.

"And, well- there's more than one way to lose your heart. A lot of people lost them to monsters called Heartless, or when their worlds were swallowed by darkness..."

N nodded in understanding. Of course there were no real technical aspects to latch on here, but the basic gist of the situation was there.

"Is there any way to return a heart to some one who's lost it?"

"Not- your original heart." Roxas doesn't count Axel's return to being Lea or his own absorbtion into Sora as either of them getting their hearts back. They wouldn't be themselves anymore.

He places a hand over his chest. "I think I'm working on a new one though."

N stared at him, expression unreadable for a few seconds. But a rare smile appeared after a second.

"I never lost my heart," though according to a certain some one, N never had one to begin with, "but I feel like I can still relate, even if our situations are quite different."

Roxas tilts his head curiously. "Did you lose something else?"

N shook his own head in response to the question.

"My father would insist I never had a heart to begin with... and I find myself believing him thanks to my own shortcomings as a person, even if there are those in my life that would argue against it."

"Why would anyone's dad tell them that?" Aren't dads supposed to be pretty nice, generally? Or at least well-meaning even if they yelled a lot.

"I mean, you seem like a normal guy to me."

Another shake of his head, his hand reaching up to give the back of Zoroark's fluffy black and red mane a ruffle.

"Where I am from, I have a gift no one else does - I can understand and speak to Pokemon. To my father, I was little more than an tool, a means to an end and a selfish one at that. The way he raised me, he made certain my interaction with other people was minimal, and that I only saw the darker side of Pokemon trainers. That is, the Pokemon that were brought to me were always abused and neglected. I was led to believe that was all trainers were capable of, and I was blinded by the prejudiced he instilled in me."

"What a jerk." ...it's okay to call people's family jerks if that's pretty much how they describe them, right?

"It's not your fault he treated you like that. And it doesn't mean you didn't have a heart or anything. Just, maybe it didn't have as much of a chance to grow."

'Jerk' is one way to describe Ghetsis, yes.

"A year ago, I would have disagreed. But I've found some one who changed my mind about a lot of things - most of all how not all trainers are the abusive scum my father tried to make me believe they were."

"That's good then. You're- judging for yourself now, right?"

"I'm trying to, yes. It's not always easy to get the negative voices out of one's head, after years of hearing them..."

"I guess I can understand that." Roxas wasn't with the Organization long enough to have heard all that Nobody propaganda for 'years,' but it was with him from the time he was born.

"It just takes time."

"Time is one thing I do have. And without my father here... as much as I wouldn't have wished this fate on anyone, even him, I know I'll be able to become a better person for it."

"A better person, huh. I haven't really thought about it like that."

Vatheon, and now the Bastion, were just places where he got to be, and to figure out the person he already was.

"Everyone has negative and positive influences in their life that shape what kind of person they are - not just throughout their life but moment by moment as well. But one negative influence can often outweigh twenty good ones. Without that presence, I am no longer influenced by his selfish desires and motivations..." N explained, somewhat breathlessly. "I'm also able to make my own choices, which is something I lacked for most of my life."

Roxas nodded. He believed in connections to people being important, and being an influence on him, but maybe he never thought about it in terms of positive or negative. Even jerks like Riku made him think. Even the bad things were important in their own way.

"I guess I'm lucky my important people were- good influences." Although it sounded a little weird to refer to Axel as a good influence. "I could've been a real jerk."

N had a much more black and white way of looking at things, but given how he was raised that was to be expected. Shades of gray were still a thing he was learning.

"It does make a difference, yes."

"Your friend must be a pretty good one, too, though." Influence, that is, but probably also a good friend. Since N didn't seem at all like the jerk he described his dad to be.